


Bound To You

by Ally_Winchester_67



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 7 Years, Abusive John Winchester, Abusive Parents, Age Difference, Angst, Apocalypse, Big Brother Sam Winchester, Bobby Singer Deals With Idjits, Bobby Singer's House, Character Death, Crossroads, Crossroads Deals, Crossroads Deals & Demons, Dean Winchester Has Anger Issues, Dean Winchester Has PTSD, Dean Winchester Has Self-Worth Issues, Dean Winchester Has a Heart, Dean Winchester Needs a Hug, Dean Winchester Needs to Use Actual Words, Dean Winchester this is why we can't have nice things, Dean goes to Hell, Demon Deals, Demons, Drinking, Emma Singer - Freeform, Everyone is legal hush, Excessive Drinking, Explicit Language, Fluff and Angst, Freeform, Friends to Lovers, How Do I Tag, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm going to quit my job just to write this, I'm killing everyone at some point, Lucy Singer, Luke Singer, Nightmares, POV Alternating, POV Dean Winchester, POV First Person, POV Original Character, Parental Bobby Singer, Past Rape/Non-con, Possessive Dean Winchester, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Bobby Singer, Protective Dean Winchester, Psychological Torture, Reader is a Hunter, Rescue, Selling souls, Shhh no one knows yet, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Supernatural Elements, Supernatural so no one ever really dies, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, This is my only reason to live, Torture, Virgin Reader, age gap, i'm dead inside, kind of, no polyamory, probably twice - Freeform, season 4
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-02-18 00:28:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21518944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ally_Winchester_67/pseuds/Ally_Winchester_67
Summary: Emma Singer, the niece of Bobby Singer, was raised as a hunter with her brother Luke and twin sister Lucy. Running from her past, the three find their way to the Winchesters. Lives are lost, deals are made. Bonds are formed that could change the course of fate herself. Emma grapples with finding hope in a damaged world, but something dark is brewing in the shadows and it's coming straight for her.****First Fic I've been brave enough to upload. Be nice, be honest and excuse me while I vomit. I'm cherry picking here. I'm taking things from other seasons and pulling the rest from my ass. Theres lots of angst, lots of action, lots of fluff, and possible some steamy stuff but I'm not sure where the story is headed. Dear Sam take the back seat of that impala because I'm on a Dean kick. I have a plan but I want this to evolve on its own! Thanks!! Also if you like it yay but please don't take my shit.****
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s), Dean Winchester/You
Kudos: 6





	1. Rot In Hell

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Myself **cue confetti**](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Myself+%2A%2Acue+confetti%2A%2A).



“Dean! Emma! Get up here! Luke just found us a case!” Sam called as we struggled to get through the door. Dean looked at me and rolled his eyes.

"We just got back." He groaned.

"How the hell did he find one already?" I said, joining Dean's complaints.

"He's your brother Ems. Go reign him in please?"

"Sam's up there with him... you're my back up Winchester."

Dean grumbled realizing this was going to require teamwork. We marched up the stairs making it clear that we were exhausted and in no mood to head out on the road. Not even dig through some research. I huffed as we got to the top of the stairs leaning back jokingly then slipping onto Dean who was just a stair behind me.

"Jesus Em get it together."

"Light fading... body's cold... I can't... go on..."

"Yeah yeah you drama queen keep it moving or we're both headed down these stairs."

"Good. Put me out of my misery." I smiled. Dean rolled his eyes pushing me towards Luke's room.

"What took you so long?" Luke had that familiar look on his face. He had been wrapped up in something and itching to hunt everything he could. I knew what he was doing because we all had been there. We've all buried ourselves in work or booze... most of the time both. It had been three months since Lucy had died and he still couldn't cope. I knew he was hurting and I hated seeing him like this. He was always the protective big bro and now he was crumbling in front of me and refusing to let me help. To be honest I don't think I even could. She was our sister. Our baby sister. She was ours to protect. But I was at the end of my rope. I lost her too, but I had to be the one to hold it together. I had tried all I could and I had been indulging his need to hunt but we had been on non stop jobs for two months now.

"Sorry Luke, I got stabbed. How inconvenient for you." I rolled my eyes throwing my balled up jacket at him. I could feel the tension in the room grow, Sam and Dean backing up to the corners of the room to steer clear. They knew better than to get in-between me and Luke's fights.

"Stitch it up and stop bitching. I found a case. Easy salt and burn be in and out in less than two days."

"Luke come on dude."

"What?"

"This is barely a case."

"We've looked into less." I gave him a doubtful look and glanced at the computer.

"Luke that is a two day drive if we don't stop."

"Okay so go pack up now. We leave in an hour."

"Luke come on man, we just got back can you... pump the breaks a little? I mean this is still fresh blood over here." I said pointing to my shoulder.

"Like I said patch it up and sleep it off in the car."

"It's not just that! We just walked in the door okay. I'm pretty sure I still have shifter shit in my hair! Lets give it a day."

"Fine then you stay and I'll go!"

"Oh step back over here we got a badass!" I said mocking him.

"You think I can't handle this? Its a slam dunk and you clearly aren't stepping up."

"Thats not what I meant and you know it. Look we promised Mom if we hunted it would be together. I know you're good, man I know it. I've seen it hell we all have, but you're on edge. So please just take a deep breath and lets get all boozed up for a night in. If you think there's still a case tomorrow then we can go but I need at least a day off. This thing isn't even killing people okay? And its in an old house thats vacant. We are covered till at least tomorrow afternoon."

"I'm going. You can come or you can stay."

"And I say you aren't. Sit your ass down." I said stepping in front of him.

"Emma get the hell out of my way."

"No Luke I'm not doing this anymore! I know you're hurting I know you're pissed. I know you need something to kill but I've had enough! Take a minute and deal with your shit! I'm not getting killed because I'm too tired from the non stop hunting! And I'm done watching you spiral!"

"I'm fine just stop with this self help crap!"

"It's not self help and its not crap Luke! Be a good little hunter and drown yourself in a bottle for the night! For once just please take a breath!"

"Don't tell me what to do. I call the shots here!"

"Bullshit! You can go ahead and walk out that door because you know I'm going to follow you and you know that its not for me. It's because you need me to save your ass and pull you out of the fire! I'm your sister Luke! I know you! We're the same and when Mom died I did the same thing but who was there pulling me back from the edge! I almost had to die for me to realize what I was doing to myself and I'm not going to wait that long for you!" We were both screaming now, not caring who heard.

"This isn't about that. I'm trying to fix this shitty world! And you would rather sit here and party with these two and Uncle Bobby than do your fucking job! You don't give a shit about anyone but you so stop pretending that you care about me or what ever promises we made Mom! You have always done your own thing and you've never given a shit about anyone but yourself! You ran off with that hunter after dad and the djinn and left me to pick up the pieces! You keep using what he did to you as an excuse! You're an arrogant bitch so stop playing what ever game this is! Get the hell out of my way!"

I stood back, almost in shock. Me and Luke were closer than anyone. Everyone thought we were twins. He had never called me any names, never swore when he spoke about me. It was his rule, after everything we went through growing up he had always promised me he was the one person I was always safe with. I knew he had to have been more than just pissed. I couldn't believe him. He was the one guy in my life who never did a thing against me. He was always in my corner and always lifted me up. It sounds stupid to be so shocked at a simple name, a simple cuss, but it was a big deal hearing it from him. I collected my self for a moment both of us still panting slightly trying to catch our breath.

"Look I know you're angry. I know you want to work. But this isn't a problem you can punch your way out of!"

"Watch me." He said. I didn't recognize my brother. He was so angry, I had never seen him like this and it scared me.

"Luke stop!" I said stepping in his way again. With a fire I had never seen he lifted his fist and punched me square in the jaw. I took a couple of steps back, my hand covering my now forming bruise. I felt my blood boil.

"ASSHOLE!" I screamed as I jumped on him striking blow after blow screaming at him. He landed a few more before I kicked him in the groin then let his head rebound off my knee. Suddenly Luke was tangled in Sam's arms and I was being lifted away kicking and screaming by Dean.

"YOU PIECE OF SHIT I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU LEAVE ON THAT HUNT TONIGHT I'LL SHOOT YOU MYSELF LUKE! PUT YOUR HANDS ON ME AGAIN AND YOU'LL BE ON THAT PYRE YOU FUCKING PRICK! YOU'RE JUST LIKE DAD! WORTHLESS WASTE OF SPACE! YOU AND HIM CAN ALL ROT IN HELL TOGETHER!"


	2. Pushed Her Too Far

I was practically foaming at the mouth, barely breathing. I could feel my throat swell as Dean dragged me to the living room.

"Emma! Hey! Emma calm down!" He threw me on the couch, kneeling to see my jaw.

"Get the hell off of me." I huffed as I pushed him away and fled to the kitchen. I could feel the rage burning in my face. Luke had never laid a hand on me. Ever. He vowed he never would. That he'd kill anyone who did. He meant it. To make matters worse what he said was no better. How dare he bring up dad. How dare he judge me for running off with Rodger. I mean Rodger was a piece of sewage but he never used him against me. He never made me feel guilty for messing up and trusting the wrong people or making a shitty judgement call. And now... well. Here we are. My face swelling with his venomous words stinging in my ears. I pulled a beer from the fridge and scrambled through the kitchen haphazardly looking for a bottle opener.

"Emma." Dean's voice was soft and raspy. He waited for me to stop and say something but I ignored him.

"Emma please just stop for a second." I didn't, I was pulling open drawers and shifting everything around roughly before slamming them shut again. I moved back and forth no rhyme or reason to what I looked inside of. I turned to the pantry in Bobby's old kitchen, still no luck.

"Emma stop!" Dean said abruptly. I did. Back to him I gripped the sink, hunched over I felt like my hands were going to tear through the edge of it.

"Breathe." He said cautiously like I was a skittish animal he was trying to avoid spooking. "Just take a second and sit down."

"I just want a beer." I whispered.

"Okay. Sit down and I'll open one." He said. I didn't sit, rather I relaxed my shoulders slightly, sliding my beer halfway down the counter top for him to grab. He picked it up and used his keys to remove the top.

"Emma just sit."

"What good will that do?"

"Well it'll give me a chance to look at you and see if you're okay."

"Dean I said I'm fine."

"And I said you aren't. Sit your ass down Singer."

"Really? You think ordering me around is a good idea right now?"

"Emma if you don't sit your ass down I'm gonna throw you over my shoulder kicking and screaming."

"Bite me asshat." I spat.

"That's it." He said rushing towards me. Before I had a chance to react I was thrown over his shoulder like he said. Definitely kicking and screaming, he marched me out the front door towards the impala.

"I have had enough of this family's bullshit now you are going to accept some damn help or I'm driving you all the way-" Before he could finish his sentence I yelped in pain. He recognized the difference and immediately put me down.

"Emma what?"

"My shoulder you ass!" He put me down on the trunk of baby and grabbed my forearm.

"Emma your stitches.. they pulled."

"Yeah no shit." He opened the back door and pulled out the med kit. I could see him start blaming himself as he wrapped his hand on the back of my neck. "It happened upstairs Dean... it was Luke." I said almost in a whisper, leaning into his hand. I could feel myself start to fade, to sway when his words jumped me back to reality.

"Take your arm out or I'm cutting the shirt." He said flatly. I knew he wasn't kidding. I pulled off my band t shirt and pulled down my strap on my tank top to give him room. He began working silently as I took gulps of my beer. After a few moments of silence Dean spoke softly.

"You're right. He's throwing himself at hunts. He's reckless and he is risking our lives too. But that's what we do Emms. We hunt. We chop off heads and burn some bones. It was keeps us sane. I can't imagine loosing Sam. And watching Sam after Lucy... I couldn't help him. It was Jess all over again." He heaved a sigh. "When you loose someone like that? I can't imagine if I lost-" he stopped short silently stuttering, "After Sam? I got no right judging him."

"Its been three months. That... that isn't sanity. Thats spiraling. Fast. We're no good on a hunt if we can't even take the time to heal or catch our breath. I'm not saying stop hunting or even slowing down too much. All I want is a flippin' day, to take a shower and eat some food that isn't a 7-Eleven burrito."

"And I think you're entitled to that. But if he wants to go whats the harm? Sam and I take time apart sometimes."

"Would you let Sam hunt, especially alone if he was like this?" There was a pause. He knew I was right.  
"No... I wouldn't." He said quietly.

"See. He's not even thinking like a hunter Dean you saw that article. There was no way it was even a case. I don't need him to braid my hair and tell me his inner most thoughts and secrets. I just need him to find a way to deal because what ever he's doing... it isn't dealing. And after everything, everything I've tried to do. He goes and throws my dad in my face? He brings up shit he promised he'd never repeat and clocks me one!"

"You got him back." Dean said with a troubled smirk, finishing up on my stitches. "And then some."

"Yeah I'm not even apologizing for that."

"Good. You were bad ass. I had a hard time pulling you off of him." He said as he returned the med kit and pulled something from the car. I used my t-shirt as a towel, wiping the blood that was visible in the moonlight from my skin.

"I don't even really know what happened. One minute I was yelling, the next I was hitting him."

"Emma you need to know that what ever just happened, it's not on you."

"Doesn't mean I'm not gonna blame myself for it. Doesn't mean I'm gonna to be okay with it."

"Thats what this is for." Dean smirked, handing me a bottle of whiskey. I paused, trying not to let it show that I was more than happy to see it. I gave in with a smile and pulled the bottle with my good arm, my lips welcomed the slight burn it brought. I took three big swigs before handing the bottle to him.

"Catch up Winchester."  
"Easy tiger you're what 100lbs soaking wet?" He smirked.

"With rocks in my pockets." I rolled my eyes as I finished his usual jab at me. He loved how small I was compared to him and Sam. Luke was the same height as Dean so I was constantly picked up and thrown around. Manhandled for their amusement. They loved to put things high up so I'd have to jump or climb to things. I hated it. Even though I was small I could hold my own, making that clear if it wasn't already after fighting Luke. I was not to be messed with. We sat there for a minute in the brisk air looking at the clear night sky. Something we'd do on trips where motels weren't always an option, or we needed a break from driving on some back road. I felt a shiver run up my spine realizing how exposed my skin was.

"Oh shit, here." He said handing me his jacket. I normally wouldn't take it but the autumn air and the bullshit night I just endured was enough to make me give in with out hesitation. I slipped it over my shoulders, slinking my good arm into the sleeve, letting the other side drape over me. It still had his body heat trapped inside and it was soothing as it washed over my icy skin. I nestled into it as he leaned up against my side, standing as I sat contently on baby.

"Bleed on my jacket and we have a problem." He smirked, his voice soft and warm.

"One it's black, two I do your laundry. You'll be fine." He laughed. I rested my head on his shoulder as we both took another swig and peered back up at the sky.

The silence was never uncomfortable. I was always happy just being with Sam and Dean. We had been hunting for a year now, we never really meant to stick together. We met on a hunt and teamed up, both parties agreeing on hitting another case a couple towns away. But when they realized me and Luke were Bobby Singer's niece and nephew we just kind of... never stopped. Bobby's house was our home base. Bobby didn't mind the break, he never thought he'd 'stop hunting' and he didn't, joining us on a few hunts here and there. But he was getting older and us giving him the chance to man the phones and go through the lore was relaxing for him. He'd never admit it but he liked the part he played.

"Emma?"

"Dean." I said playfully thinking it was some new dig he was coming at me with.

"What did you mean... Luke is just like your Dad?" Oh shit. This was not a conversation I wanted to have. With anyone. I meant what I said when I told Dean that I blacked out, I had forgotten what I let slip. I never talked about my dad and for good reason. I stiffened up, pulling my head off his shoulders.

"Nothing. I was just pissed."

"Em you told him they could both rot in hell. That doesn't sound like nothing."

"Well it was." My eyes glazed over as I tried to suppress the memories.

"Emms."  
"Jesus Dean just let it go."

"Fine! Okay. But you realize what ever that meant, what ever you're thinking about avoiding telling me is the same thing he's doing."

"No it's not."

"Clearly it is. You yell at him and tell him to handle his shit then you refuse to let anyone in."

"Dean it's not important."

"Bullshit Emma."

"It's not something I talk about. Ever."

"So I was right. There is something."

"Dean drop it."

"What you think you can't trust me?"

"It's not about trust Dean its... its... Where do you get off slapping me with this sharing is caring bullshit while you're a fucking emotional lock box? Any mention of a heart to heart and you get all huffy and defensive."

"Like you aren't doing the same thing!"

"D for Bobby's sake... drop it."

"No."

"Yes Dean."

"No."

"Fuck off Dean. I mean it."

"Oh okay. So fuck me right? I'm not perfect but clearly you're going through something and I'm trying to fucking help you! Just fucking-"

"I can't!" I cried out.

"No you won't!"

"D... it's not just about- I... I can't- Bobby can't know okay. He has this thing about my dad, he thinks so much of him and if he were to find out... it'd kill him."

"Does it look like the old drunk is here? Look you don't have to tell me but let it out. Find a therapist or better yet a bartender or someone and just let it out. This isn't the first time I've heard shit like that about your dad. I see the way you close up when you talk about him and the last time I heard the name Rodger you near about shot Luke for bringing it up. I know what this life does to a hunter. I know how it can mess with your head and how you will always take it out on the ones you love. My dad did plenty."

"Dean its not that simple." He was a few paces from the impala now, both of us avoiding eye contact. Do I tell him? How do I even- where do I start.

"Maybe it is, maybe it isn't but-" I cut him off, the words spilling out uncontrollably. I didn't want to tell him. I didn't want the pity. I didn't want to look weak and or stupid and lets be honest what I was about to tell him made me look like... feel like a vulnerable little girl.

"He didn't slap me around one times too many after a rough hunt Dean." I hissed finally beaten down from his badgering. The booze was now coursing through my veins and I could feel my words begin to flow but by the time I was ready to stop myself I had said too much. Dean slowly made his way back to me, his hands falling on either side of me, boxing me in as I spoke.

"He didn't use corporal punishment to get me to fall in line. He would beat me. Senseless. My mom and Lucy too. He held Luke up like some chosen son and hated me for being born. He broke my ribs and fractured my face when I was 13. He'd use me as bait on hunts and if he didn't like some bullshit thing I did because I was being a fucking kid, he'd leave me out there a minute or two longer than he should have. Why do you think my back and my stomach look like this. What do you think these scars on my chest are from? This is more than a close call or a hunt gone wrong. Its a father who hated his daughter enough to let a wolf tear her up or a vamp drain her dry. My father fed me to a djin and let me bleed out for two days. Two days Dean. He left me for dead. I ran off that night and took Lucy with me. We stayed with hunters we knew, hopped around on hunts to motels that were sketchy enough to not question two obvious runaways. I met this hunter. Few years older than me. He turned out to be just like my dad. Some shit went down and I sent Lucy to Bobby's. Got her out first so if I fucked up the escape... she'd be safe st least. I was the one he wanted. Instead of coming after me he told my dad he caught wind of me. Dad found me that night, tried to kill me. He thought he did. Left me behind a dumpster of his motel. Luke found me after that. He brought me to Bobby's and beat my dad to a pulp. He promised me he'd protect me just to turn around and... How do I-"I choked out a sob.

"Emma oh my g-" He was in front of me now, one hand on my legs, one holding my cheek. I couldn't even look at him. I had my eyes glued on his boots. I hadn't cried yet but the tears were flooding my eyes. One tear dropped to my cheek as Dean's thumb wiped it away.

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have pushed I... none of that is something someone should carry alone. What your dad... did. It's not right. Its far from it. And Luke, I can't believe he said- he should have never said-" He was so furious, for me, he could barely put a sentence together.

"Luke told me he'd never be like my father. He'd never let anyone do that to me. But after tonight? I can't look at him the same. He's my bother, but any trust we had is gone." We stayed there for a moment, I was trying to catch my breath, as Bobby's car pulled up.

"Don't tell Bobby about this. Any of it. Please. I can't deal with that tonight." He nodded, I didn't look at his face but I caught a glimpse of the pity he felt for me. I hated it. I didn't want pity, I just wanted someone to see that I was trying to save my damn brother.

"Hey idgits." Bobby called jokingly as he stepped out of his car. "Whoa baby girl what happened." He ran up to me, worry in his eyes.

"Shifter took me for a couple rounds." I tried to laugh it off to calm him down.

"She took him down though. Little badass over here." Dean flashed me a smile.

"You patched my girl up?" Bobby asked giving Dean an intense glare.

"Yes sir."

"Good. Now get away from her." He said flatly. He liked Dean at an arms length. Said he was a bad influence.

"Too late." I said holding up the whiskey with a shit eating grin.

"Balls. You shouldn't be drinking."

"I'm 20."

"Too young."

"Close enough. Care for a few rounds? I think I still got some pizza in the fridge. Poker anyone?"

"I'll get the cigars." Bobby smiled hopping up the stairs. I hadn't seen him in a while and I think we all missed our poker nights. I hopped off the Impala and took another swig walking inside.

"Emms, wait." Dean said grabbing my arm. He smiled and pulled me into him wrapping his arms around me.

"We are gonna figure something out. Sam probably has him calmed down. He'll turn in for the night and we can just play some cards. Have a few too many drinks. Sound good for at least tonight?" He asked almost pleading. I took a deep breath and leaned into his chest.

"Yes please." I whispered.

DEANS POV

I could feel her body begin to relax as I held her to me. I loosened my grip on her, she hung there for a moment, then pulled back.

"Thank you Dean." She reached up on her tip toes barely reaching me, so I leaned in as she planted a soft warm kiss on my cheek. She turned and hopped inside. I don't think she ever realized how she did that, lightly floated up the stairs. She was so small, I know I gave her shit for it. But I loved watching her move. Like she was walking on air. I'd never have guessed that she could take down anyone let alone a monster, unless I had just watched her hand her brothers 6'2" ass to him upstairs. When he threw that punch I thought I was going to shoot him. But when I watched her take him down it reminded me of the night I met them.

We were looking into a case in Ohio, pulling out the fed threads when the local PD caught wind of a female who was on the FBI's most wanted list. Of course we had no idea who she was when the sheriff said he got a tip she was in town. We played it off pretending we knew but that was the closest we ever got to blowing our cover. They thought she was a serial killer. But really she was hunting down everything she could with not a care in the world who saw her face. Her and Luke were too good at covering their tracks and getting away mostly unscathed. She had so many things wracked up on the wanted poster, hell we thought it was her too.

We broke into an old warehouse assuming we'd find a hub of demons, instead we watched her get tortured for a good 15 minutes before breaking free and killing 5 demons solo. Then Luke came in and caught us in the back. We would have helped but our jaws were on the floor. We revealed who we were and celebrated with some beers. She was so... cool. It sounds so plain to say that but really she was so relaxed, and didn't give a shit about what people thought. But she was kind too. Never harsh or rude. She had a sparkle in her eye that turned into fire when she was hunting. She was the perfect balance of light and dark and being near her was intoxicating. I had never thought about anyone as much as I thought about her. To the point where I was kicking myself. Sam would poke fun and I'd always deny it but I stopped with the bar crawls and the girls the moment I met her. It could never go anywhere. Not with our lives. Plus she was 20 now and I was almost 27. I looked like a damn creep. Luke and Bobby would have my head if they knew how much I wanted her. But she wasn't some girl in a bar she was a friend. A best friend. She was someone I've fought with, fought beside, hell fought for. Someone I trusted and had this weird need to protect. I couldn't explain it. But she was it.

We worked a few cases with them before finding out that her and Luke were family to Bobby, then we never really stopped. Her and Luke moved like twins. Some of the scariest hunters I've ever seen, in a good way. And they were naturals. It was like watching me and Sammy. We were the perfect storm and with the four of us and Bobby backing our plays, we never lost. But after they lost Lucy, things shifted. Emma was right he was falling apart. I wanted to help him, to help her. But this was between them.

I followed in behind her and leaned in the doorway, admiring her. She gave Bobby a big hug, opened a beer for him with his keys like I taught her, and skipped up stairs.

"Be down in a few old man. Don't drink all my booze!" She shouted. Her voice sounded so happy and light, but I caught a glimpse of her face as she bounded up the stairs. She wasn't okay. I pushed too far.


	3. Moving Forward

EMMAS POV

I ran upstairs and jumped in the shower. I hot water was soothing on my skin but burned my open cuts. Soon the pain dissipated and the heat a calm washed over me. I was finally able to breathe. I cut off the water not wanting to make the boys wait too long. I wiped the steam aside from the mirror and took a look at myself. It wasn't too bad I thought. My chin was bruised on one side from Luke's fist but it was subtle. My lip was split and I had a crack in my skin through the tail of my eyebrow. But all in all I looked okay.

I grabbed a towel and scrunched my natural curls up. Luckily a little water, some scrunching and some hair product made my hair perfect. It was easy and simple. The way I liked it. I put on some tinted foundation, I wasn't sure if the shade was right on my tan skin. I got it at some beauty store when a hunt turned out not to be... well... a hunt. But it worked. I flicked on a little mascara and some tinted lip balm. I threw on an old tank top and a pair of pajama shorts. I fished in my closet for my thin dark grey robe that fell just below my shorts and made my way down the stairs, my hair still slightly damp. I jumped to the bottom of the staircase and slipped on my slippers as I scooted into the study. The table was filled with old newspapers and books along with empty beer bottles. Sam was down stairs finally.

"Hey kid." Sam called standing up.

"Practically the same age as you kid." I smirked back, still in the kitchen grabbing beers for us all. Sam stepped in.

"Got him drunk. He's asleep. He's fine for now. I told him I'd go with him on the hunt tomorrow, the two of us. I think some space will do you guys good. How are you holding up." He said quietly as not to alert Bobby.

"I'm fine okay, one more person asks me that and I'm gonna start shooting."

"Sheeshh okay." He huffed with a smile.

"Sam? Thank you for taking care of him. I just... I-"

"It's not a problem. You guys are family. Just no more fight club okay Brad Pitt?" I laughed handing him his beer.

"Here you go drunk number one..." I said handing Bobby his beer. I slipped around the coffee table, jumped down the on leather sofa next to Dean.

"And for you drunk number two."

"Says the chick who just drank half my whiskey." He said nudging my arm. I winced slightly.

"Oh shit-"

"Oh my god it's fine lets play." I rolled my eyes, my voice inpatient.

"That might be a little tough." Bobby said holding up cards covered in.... Something.

"Gross what is that?" I said trying to distance myself from the red goo dripping off of the deck.

"It was in the top drawer of my desk." Bobby said, puzzled.

"Dean I told you to close the lambs blood man come on!" Sam moaned.

"What! I thought I did! We had to haul ass its not my fault!" I laughed as the boys argued and bickered. It was like me and Luke. But after tonight? I had no idea who he was.

We laughed and talked... and drank until about 1am. Bobby turned in for the night giving me a kiss on the top of my head and telling the boys to keep it down or he'd kill them (or something to that effect.)

"Movie anyone?"

"Depends...." Dean said skeptically.

"Haunting in Connecticut?" I said holding up the bootleg DVD. Nothing was 'authentic' around here.

"Come on we live that movie."

"Fine. Monty Python and the Holy grail?" I asked with a grin.

"Oh hell yes. Not as dumb as she looks folks."

"Bite me."

"You wish." He retorted. I glanced back giving him an odd look. He had never really said stuff like that to me before. Must be the booze. I popped it in grabbed some beers and fished the pie out of the cooler.

"Oh my GOD I forgot we had that."  
"Yes. We. You're sharing."

"What?"

"I cooked it!" He rolled his eyes and gave in.

I cut him a larger piece and plopped down on the couch, laying my legs over his lap, eyes glued to the screen. Shit. What was I doing? Well, yet again... the booze. Dean and I were always comfortable around each other but it was subtle. And never in front of Sam. I glance over to his chair... it was empty. I figured he had gone to bed when Bobby did and brushed it off. We sat and laughed at the movie, quoting it and speaking over the actors. It was our favorite movie and we knew it line by line. Sometimes when we'd be out we'd throw the quotes back and forth laughing at each other while Sam and Luke tolerated us. They were more withdrawn and quiet than we were. But I loved times like these with him. I felt normal, like I could let loose and enjoy my time with out judgement.

I don't remember when I fell asleep but I woke up with 30 minutes left in the movie. Dean was still asleep. My legs were still in his lap, his head keeled over. He was sunk into me, smiling almost with one hand wrapped around my waist. I sat there for a second and admired him. I never really looked at him unless I was patching him up. He was... cute? Was that the word? Cute? I mean he looked like he was fucking created from clay. His stubble was a little over grown and his eyes hung heavily. He was clearly tired. As I sat there and examined his face, he began to stir. His eyes began twitching and his breathing changed. I could hear faint grunts and sharp breaths, words he was too unconscious to fully speak, I could make out some of what he was saying, it sounded like... Sam, help me. Sam please. Then my name. Emilia. With one quick breath my name escaped his lips, more clearly than the other words and he shot straight up, sitting like he was before. He was panting, trying to catch his breath.

"Dean whoa... okay hey breathe." He was still looking ahead as he tried but failed to calm himself.

"Dean hey you gotta breathe okay. In and out in and out." I said trying to model the breaths. He looked over to me, the fear and panic on his face faded in confusion.

"What happened?" He asked through labored breath.

"We passed out... you... woke up kinda... quick." I didn't want to say it was a nightmare and get him all testosterone-ie and have him try to defend his manly man hood by denying it happened.

"Yeah I get that." He was a little calmer but still wasn't okay. My legs were still over his tensed up body, his hands digging into my calves.

"Dean hey, its okay you're good." His eyes fell to mine, illuminated by the final scenes in the movie.

"Damn we missed it." He said trying to play it all off. I paused as he lowered the volume.

"Dean?"

"Yeah?" He said as he pinched his forehead and rubbed his face.

"What was that? I mean what were you dreaming about." He waited. Choosing he words carefully.

"It was a hunt, I uh... a bad hunt."

"Okay... Dean if-"

"It was hell." He blurted out. I had no idea what to say. What I lived through felt like hell on earth, but Dean really went there. He had been there for a long time. I never really got the details but I knew it was bad, it was something that haunted him.

"Dean..." I said, not sure of what else I could say. I shifted up on to my knees moving closer to him. I let my eyes drift past him and placed my hands on his. It took too of mine to wrap around his. I wanted to tell him I was sorry and that he was fine now but I knew how much that wouldn't fix him. Instead I placed my head on his shoulder, and almost as if he knew... he placed his arm around me.

"I can't imagine." I could feel him shift as he heard my words. "I'll never be able to. I know talking isn't your answer. Ever." I scoffed. "But what ever happened isn't happening again. What ever went on, you survived it. Thanks to a stubborn brother, an old drunk, and a baby in a trench coat. You have people here. We've got you. No matter what." I could feel his shoulders relax. We hung there for a long time. Breathing in the silence.

"Everyone says they're sorry. It's not my fault." He let his words hang in the air. "Nobody gets it. Why do you?"

"I... I don't. I just know there are things you can't put into words, and when someone tells you its okay when it's not, its the last thing you want to hear. If people say they get it when you know they don't, they aren't listening right. Everybody has pain in their life. But its all different. You can't compare that shit. You just gotta, keep moving. Keeping moving till its far enough away for you to let people back in." He let out a breathy snort.

"What about you. Have you... moved far enough past it?" He asked.

"I don't know. I guess you really don't until you wake up one day and realize the nightmares aren't as often or as bad. And you have other things in life that matter more... that can pull you out regardless of how deep in the fire you are."

Dean began to move, I thought he was going to get up, as I straightened my body our eyes found each other. He place my hand in his palm and I could feel my body relax into his hand. His other slid up my side and around my back pulling me onto his lap, we hovered over each other for a moment. Breathing each other in. He slowly brought his lips to mine, as if he was exploring this new place on me. His lips caressed mine. They were soft and warm. Then, all of a sudden my lips were crashing into his. My hands holding his face, the tips of my finger reaching the back of his neck, pulling him in deeper to my kiss. His hands were gently rested on my back, as if to hold himself back from anything more than this kiss. I could feel each hand stretching almost the complete length and width of my back. I was sitting on him, one leg on each side as we melted into each other. The moment seemed to last forever, when we both pulled for air. Our eyes still closed, foreheads pressed together as we lingered in each others breath. He smelt, tasted of whiskey and gun powder. I took him in with a sharp slow breath trying to find my rhythm again. I could feel my heart racing. I placed one hand on the nape of his neck and one over his heart, feeling his beating in sync with mine. I leaned back trying to keep myself from finding his lips again.

"Dean... I-" He placed a firm kiss on my lips, his body leaning up into mine as he lifted his back from the couch. I froze, unable to move, so happy to be in this place, with him. With Dean. It was warm and soft but firm. He was restraining himself which meant a lot because I knew his reputation though I never saw it. I assumed he was sneaky about the girls he took home. What I did see was scores of girls falling head over heels for the handsome stranger in the bar or the diner.

I pulled back, my hand on his chest I gripped his shirt in frustration, keeping him at a safe distance, but not too far. I panted for a moment trying to wrap my head around what just happened.

"Oh... I'm sorry I... I thought- It was the booze I'm such an-" He stuttered, I could feel his heart sink, his body begin to pull away.

"No." I said quickly almost pulling him back in. "No it's not that." I mean booze was a factor who was I kidding I would never had pulled this sober. "I just..." My voice was barely there, embarrassed at the idea of being another notch in his belt. "I... I don't want to be the thing that helps you... move forward. I don't want to make anything weird... I'm not gonna be some girl at a bar who...." I trailed off.

"You think I kissed you because it was convenient?" He looked at me almost shocked.

"I think you kissed me because you had a nightmare and it's been a rough night. Because our lives suck and this is a good... distraction."

"Em. No." He said hesitating for a moment, I could feel his body trying to decide if he should move or not. His lips were against mine once again and I fell into him harder than the times before. He was there, his hands on my body, his lips crashing against mine. And then, just as quickly as they came, he pulled back, taking in another sharp breath. We paused, lingering there again. It was like a tug of war between self-control and absolute bliss. I couldn't remember the last time something felt so right, the last time I felt so at home. He nestled his head on my shoulder, my arms wrapped around his neck. I ran my fingers through his hair as his hands pulled me into him. We both sat there for a moment. He knew I wasn't going to let it go further and it felt as though he never intended it to be that way. I had no idea if this was one of those times that Dean needed comfort from someone, or if the night, the secrets we shared, had brought us closer and it was me that he wanted.

"You need sleep." He whispered. I nodded my head suddenly feeling how exhausted I was.

"Just- Can we just lay here? For a minute?" He nodded back to me. What was I doing? I had never acted so... needy. But I didn't care. I couldn't leave his arms. I slowly pulled myself off his lap and settled in next to him. He kissed the top of my head and kept his head against mine, combing a hand through my hair as we drifted off.


	4. Butch's Deli

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I research all the locations so yes this is a real place with amazing reviews and the distance is accurate from where the salvage yard should be. I have OCD MMMKKKKAAYYYYYYYY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Filler chapter to establish the already formed friendship if I've ever seen it.........

DEAN’S POV

She was out like a light. Absolutely gone. God she was so beautiful. The room was dim but looking over her face I could see the bruise Luke left on her. The aftermath of their fight. I had never seen her so pissed, so angry and hurt. She never let things like that get under her skin. Her and Luke fought sure. But something had shifted now. 

She squirmed slightly in her sleep, couldn’t have been comfortable in that position all folded up. I pulled myself from her just enough to scoop her into my arms. God it was so easy. Her head rested on my shoulder as I walked her up the stairs. Opening her door and laying her down she called out to me. 

“Dean?”  
“Yeah Ems.”  
“What-“  
“Passed out downstairs sleeping beauty. You need to sleep in a bed not on Bobby’s shitty couch.” I said finally laying her down. As I pulled my hands away she grabbed me weakly, the exhaustion from the night was weighing her down.  
“Stay.”  
“Emma… I don’t know-“  
“Please.” Her eyes were barely open as she asked me. I placed a kiss on her head.  
“Okay. Just gimme a second.” She hummed in response settling into her pillows. 

I slipped out to me and Sam’s room careful not to wake him I got into some sweats. God I was going to hell for this but she begged me to stay so what can I do. I padded back down the hall finally tired enough to sleep when Luke’s door opened. He looked out the door missing me before moving down the hall way.

“Hey. Where are you going?” He spun around, his face swollen from Emma. Yup. She’s a badass.  
“Out. Leave it Dean.”  
“Dude come on. Tonight was a shit show, I get that. But is it the smartest move to bail like this?”  
“I’m not bailing, I’m hunting. People need me if no one else is gonna step up.”  
“Luke she needs you. This is gonna kill her when she wakes up.”  
“Dean, you are one of my best friends, but stop worrying about her. She ain’t yours to take care of.”  
“Someone has to and it clearly isn’t you. You talk about protecting her constantly but who was the one who socked her in the jaw man? The fuck is wrong with you?” My words washed over him and a bitter look fell on his face. Poor wording on my part. Shit.  
“I already warned you Dean. You need to back off. Things could get real ugly if not.”  
“That’s not what I meant. I know the deal man. I buried it down but shit she lost Lucy too. Man up and fix this. You're acting like a damn child. You're lucky Bobby wasn't here because he wouldn have done what I wanted to.” I growled back low.  
“Leave… her… alone. She's my sister. And if you go near her Dean I swear to god...” He hissed as he stomped down the hallway and out the door. His truck roared down the road as I wrestled with myself. I got his warning, loud and clear. No way I was sliding into her bed tonight. Shouldn’t have kissed her either. God I was so stupid. Reaching to close her door I heard a whimper. Peaking in she was panting breathing heavily and twitching slightly. The word no passed her lips twice, before I knew it my legs carried me to her. I brushed the hair from her face and she lurched back, still asleep. She looked terrified as one more whine escaped her. I wasn’t the only one unable to sleep through the night I guess. 

“Ems shhhhh it’s okay.” I whispered as I laid beside her, pulling her to my chest. She tensed at first before relaxing into me. Her head on my chest, her hand on my heart. I was screwed. So freaking screwed. I had just spoken to Luke about this. Just decided it was a bad idea. Knew she had some liquor in her and she was almost a decade younger than me. But I couldn’t help it. I was drawn to her like a freaking magnet. I couldn’t help it. A year of burying it down and now… after tonight… I couldn’t. There was no going back. 

EMMAS POV

As I woke up the morning light seeped through my thin curtains, the sun soaking my room. I was buried in my cocoon of pillows and blankets, the sun warming my body. I lifted my head slowly. How did I get here? I remember falling asleep on the couch with Dean. I pushed my body up, leaning on my elbows. I rubbed my head and my eyes began to open slowly. My bed was... warm. I was pushed over on the side of the bed, not the middle. Looking behind me I could see lifted sheets and a large indent. Oh fuck. I think I asked Dean to sleep here last night. No I absolutely did. I shook my head as it began to pound. Looking back I realized he didn't stay. He must have for a little. But he didn't stay. Fabulous. All last night was, was me looking like a fool and Dean looking for a quick fix. I looked at the alarm clock. 9:37 am. I was shocked at how late I had slept in. I was always up at 6:30 making breakfast for my boys but by the sounds of the commotion in the kitchen, it was being taken care of. I sunk back into bed momentarily when I heard my door creak open. I raised my head off the bed again to see Dean leaning in my door way.

"Mornin'." He said, a sweet grin on his face.

"Oh... hey." I said, my voice still raspy.

"How you feeling?"

"Like I got hit with a Mac Truck." I knew he was clearly amused by my pain letting out a chuckle.

"Yeah well with the amount of whiskey you had and the beating you took I'm not surprised." I furrowed my brow. "I brought you some pain killers for your head and some coffee. Bobby tried cooking so I wouldn't go down there just yet."

"Oh... thank you." I said quietly, hesitant to take them from him. His grin faded slightly. I walked over to him pulling them from his hands with a smile. He held on to them not letting me leave.

"Em look-"

"Dean you don't have to say it. I get it. We drank, shit was said, its ok-"

"No I do because clearly you don't listen."

"What?" I thought I was getting the last night was fun speech.

"Emma I was sober....."

"Oh."

"And I mean I know you weren't.... You drank and we said a lot of things and I wasn't trying to..." He sighed clearly frustrated. "Look I feel like an ass but last night... I wanted you... But I didn't think that you'd ever... and with Bobby and Luke..." God the poor guy wasn't great with words. Be damned if he wasn't trying though. He was somehow closer to me. I hadn't felt him move but he now I could smell him. He must have been fresh from the shower minty breath but there was always a twinge of gunpowder that hung around him. I looked down, avoiding his eyes.

"I... I meant what I said to you. I'm not regretting anything we did. But I'm not some hussy at a bar. I'm not here to be the thing that helps you move on only to get left behind. If thats what that was then lets shake hands and agree to let last night be what it was and nothing more." His face had so many emotions rolling through I couldn't get a read. I was never unsure of myself. I always knew what I wanted but I felt so... nervous around him. It was so far from my comfort zone. Any guy I had been with was a stranger that I could charm. But Dean knew me better than anyone.

"So thats what you want? You want to part ways and pretend that this was nothing?"

"No but-" I started to say. Suddenly his lips were on mine again. His kiss was firm, sure.

"There's my answer Em. Whats yours." It took a moment for my brain to catch up but when it did I felt a smile creep on my face as I gave him the same 'answer' he gave me. We hung there in the bliss of it all. Maybe Dean actually... wanted me? Maybe he cared about more than finding comfort.

"Is she up yet Dean?" Bobby called from the kitchen knocking me out of my thoughts.

"Yes I am." I called back, Dean and I let out a giggle.

"Well hurry up and get your ass down here." He called.

"Shove it old man!" I laughed back. I gently kissed his cheek, feeling his beard that had begun to grow out, pulling what he brought me from his hands. I placed the pills on the night stand and threw my hair into a pony tail. Grabbing my coffee I turned to find Dean still standing in the door, smiling. Beaming really.

"What?" I laughed uncomfortably.

"I can't look?"

"No. You can't." I smiled as I tried to walk past him.

"Emma wait..." He trailed off. "Luke... he left this morning."

"What where?" I asked feeling the worry rising in me.

"He went to look at that case. Sam and I turned on his gps on his car and his phone. Sam is gonna head up to get him soon. I think it's best if he goes." I nodded. There was no way I was going. Dean could have gone. But him and Sam got along better than him and Dean did. I think it was a competitive thing. Dean and Luke were the same age and Sam was three years older than me. Sam and I were like best friends but Dean and Luke were always super protective of me. I never got why Dean was but I think I was starting to understand why.

"Good. Maybe Sam should just let him go." I said flatly

"Oh Em you don't mean that."

"Yes I do." I stared at him harshly. "We can keep tabs on him with the gps but I don't want him here. We've spent our whole lives together. We paid our dues and we said what ever goodbyes we needed to last night. Lucy or not that fight was bound to happen. He's gone. I'm good."

"No you aren't. I know you aren't. Cut that shit."

"Dean I was actually less pissed than usual this morning... do you wanna ruin that?" He sighed. He knew I was the most stubborn person he knew. That I would get my way and we would drop it or I'd drop him. I was a raw nerve and he wasn't looking to mess with me. I slid past him pulling my coffee to my lips as I stepped down the stairs. It wasn't hot anymore and the flavor was gone. I only drank coffee if it was fresh from the pot. No good otherwise. I glided into the kitchen adding new coffee to my cup breathing life and heat into it again.

"Hey princess."

"Hey dumbass."

"Classy. Wanna enlighten me on what ever happened with you and your brother?"

"No actually I don't."

"Well you're gonna." He gruffed as I kept my back to him.

"Nope."

"Em. Something happened he came flying out of here looking like he went five rounds with a brick wall and you slept in later than you ever has."

"Uncle Bobby leave it be."

"Emilia Rosemary Singer tell me whats happening or so help me I will beat it out of you."

"This is what happened." I barked spinning around, pointing to my jaw. "He threw Lucy and Mom in my face and knocked me around so I hit him back. He left to go on some suicide mission up north because god forbid anyone in this family handles their shit. So I'm gonna pour some whiskey in my coffee and go get some food that some old drunk didn't cremate!" Bobby stood there slightly in shock.

"Emma I'm sorry..."

"Don't be, just leave me be until you find me a damn hunt." "Thought you wanted a break." "Yeah well Singer men really bring out the need for me to stab something." I grumbled as I marched up stairs. I went into my closet and pulled my black jeans from the shelf. I grabbed my grey thin long sleeve top from its hanger and my black high heeled combat boots. I threw on some basic makeup to hide the zombie look and my now much darker bruises. I curled a few pieces of my hair that the curl had fallen from the day before and grabbed my cash from my stash.

"Where are you going?" I could hear Dean hanging in my doorway again. Was that his favorite spot? Why the hell didn't he come in ever. I mean we swapped spit last night and all but professed our deep connection to each other. Not to mention the shared the most private and painful events in our life.

"On a ride on my bike. I need to blow off some steam."

"No you're not." I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Excuse you?" He realized how it sounded and began to try and back peddle.

"You're coming with me. I need your help."

"Doubtful. I'd like some peace and my bike is the way I'm gonna get it."

"Would you just let someone else be in charge for a damn second? You are coming with me because I have a plan and you're gonna like it. Plus I can smell the whiskey on you. Theres no way I'm letting you drive."

"How the hell can you tell?" He smiled like I had offered him a challenge. He moved towards me and in one swoop he was backing me up against the wall next to the window frame. I put his hands on the wall on either side of me and leaned in with a devious smile. Crap. It was sexy as hell. I was supposed to be mad but how the hell could I focus on anything but not jumping his bones? I began to say something along the lines of back the hell up if you know whats good for you when his lips met mine.

"Yup. Whiskey." He smiled licking his lips as he pulled away eyes still shut.

"Doesn't mean jack."

"Emma... please. Get your sweet ass in the damn car." He was incredibly irritated with me after the night we had. He spoke through his teeth with a bit of a laugh clearly frustrated with how strong willed I am. I huffed grabbing my dark red leather jacket, swinging it over me with a twinge of pain as my shoulder rotated. I forgot I had stitches. I marched down stairs and all the way to the impala. He started her up and we drove off.

"Roll down your window." He ordered. I shot him a look but quickly did as he cranked his down.

"Grab me that tape with the blue nail polish on it." Why the hell did he have nail polish on a cassette? I handed it to him as the engine roared the music began to fade in harmony with it. It was my favorite song. I leaned my head back and took a deep breath of the fresh air. A smile flitted across my lips, content and feeling that peace I craved.

"I love this song." I said breathing in the clean air. Dean was smiling looking out over the dash at the open stretch of road ahead. As burnin for you faded out another song came on.

"What tape is this?" I asked. I was picky and only liked a handful of songs on each tape he had. Never two in a row.

"A new one. Ish." He said shrugging with a smirk.

"Lemme see the box." I said pulling the case into view. It was every single one of my favorite songs. I flipped it over and it had my name on it.

"What is this?"

"Well your birthday is soon and me and Sam had been working on a tape for your truck. Put all the ones we know you love on there. I figured today was as good a day as any."

"I love it." I smiled as I cranked up Fortunate Son and Dean revved the engine.

We drove for a little and I had accidentally fallen asleep.

"Emms get up we're here." My eyes opened slowly, still defiantly hung over from the night before.

"Where the hell are we?" I looked around. Then I realized where we were.

"Dean did you drive all the way to Butch's!?" I shouted.

"Sure did." He said with a grin spread wide across his face clearly please with himself.

"Dean thats a two hour drive. For sandwiches."

"Yeah..." He said slowly puzzled I'd even question it.

"Oh my god."

"What! You said it was the best hangover cure in the midwest and the best craft beer around."

"So you drove two hours on a whim because I got hammered last night."

"Yeah... come on!" He hopped out of the door so quick he almost fell over, scrambling to my side of the car.

"M'lady." He said in a silly voice as he opened my door.

"Don't start with that." I hadn't seen him let this loose in a long time. It was weird. He was....giddy.

We got a table in the corner and ordered our food. We sat for over an hour laughing and talking about nothing important. It felt really nice to not have to overthink everything. To have some time away from anything monster related. It was like we put it aside for a while.

"Heres your check Darlin'." The waitress passed Dean the bill. I slammed $15.00 on the table and Dean shot me a disapproving look.

"No this ones on me."

"No... this one is on..." I grabbed his card out of his hand. "Frehley Simmons.... Really dean? Kiss?"

"Don't you dare say another word Emms or I'm gonna leave you in Nebraska." His eyebrows practically hit his hair line. I raised up my hands as if to surrender.

"How about I leave the tip so this poor girl actually gets her tip?" We laughed loudly drawing attention of some of the other patrons.

"Fine. Lets get out of here what do you say?" Dean smiled like he knew something I didn't. He paid the bill and the waitress returned the slip for him to sign lingering before she waltzed away. It was odd. Dean paused for a moment eyes slightly bigger looking at the piece of paper.

"What too much? I've got cash lemme see." I said ripping it away from Dean as he protested.

"I'm off at 4 give me a call big boy." It said in the corner with a little lipstick mark. I quietly handed Dean the cash required and stood up pretending it wasn't a big deal. Like it wasn't as irritating as it was. But Dean and I had kissed. So what. Big deal. It was a liquor induced night and I wasn't going to hold him to anything. We had been avoiding any talk of it like we always did. I began to walk away when he grabbed my arm pulling me back around.

"Emma..." He called.

"Thanks for lunch Dean... but we should go. Bobby probably has a case ready-" Suddenly his lips were on mine. Pressed tightly, not moving, just there. I had that head rush again, I could feel my body leaning up into his, his hands holding my face as mine wrapped around his wrists. My mind was frozen. He pulled away and I had stayed there stunned. I opened my eyes to see him smiling, almost laughing.

"Come on babe." He said way too loud and wrapped his arm around my shoulder and leading me out. Oh god he must have known I was jealous. But he pulled off a pretty amazing exit, my face was slightly red and I was happy he made the effort.

"What is with you?" I laughed as we went back to the car and I pulled his arm off me.

"What?" He shot me a puzzled look. "I just... I want to do something other than hunting. Get your mind off of everything." I smiled.

"Well it worked."

"Hows your hangover?"

"Much better. Grease helps." I gave him a hug and walked to the passenger side of the car.

"You ready? We should probably head back." I asked, he was starring off, something weighing on his mind.

"What if we didn't? What if we took some time and went on a road trip."

"Dean we do that daily. To hunt. Same thing."

"I mean what if we took a trip that didn't involve decapitations or latin incantations?"

"Who are you and what have you done with Dean Winchester?" I joked hopping into the car.

"Em I think maybe we should take some time off." He said quietly, joining me in the impala.

"No you think I should take some time off. Dean I'm not some wounded animal."

"I know you aren't but come on. Its been rough going for a while, we deserve a break. Your whole fight with Luke started because you thought we needed one and now... what? You've changed your mind? Ems come on."

"Dean time off for us isn't like other people. We had some time. We had a movie night and... some other stuff. And we drove all the way out here. This was our break D. I'm content and now I just want to kill something. Stop trying to bench me."

"Em I'm not trying to bench you. I'm trying to make sure you aren't doing exactly what Luke is doing..."

"I'm not talking about Luke okay Dean. I thought you understood that. And I'm not spiraling. I'm just... Everything is a shit storm and going on some milk run... it'll fix that a little."

"I'm sorry but you need to hear the truth. Both of you are running. Stop running and take a moment to yourself."

"This was a moment Dean. We took it. We are spending half the day just to come to a diner."

"A great diner." He smirked. "Fine. We can head back to Bobby but... no cases. Just a relaxing day." I nodded as we both slid into the car, turning the engine and enjoying the music, road, and the little bit of peace we had left before we returned to the salvage yard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I research all the locations so yes this is a real place with amazing reviews and the distance is accurate from where the salvage yard should be. I have OCD MMMKKKKAAYYYYYYYY


	5. Deal's a Deal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shits gonna hit the fan..... LETS GO

We pulled up through the rows and rows of cars and trash that Bobby called a front yard and sat for a moment, the impala still running. Bobby was heating up the grill and Sam was deep in lore on the front porch. It was nice to get away from Bobby's after last night. I had been chomping at the bit to get back but here I was wishing Dean would turn the impala around and take me off to somewhere. Maybe my stubbornness was getting in the way. I always thought I was stubborn because I was right. Never because I was arrogant and wanted to be right. But I was wishing I had taken Dean up on the road trip.

"Not too late to shag ass." He smiled at me from the drivers seat. I smiled trying to hide it almost as a bang bang bang on the window made me jump.

"You two gettin' out or what?" There was Uncle Bobby holding raw burgers in his hands with a look of, well almost panic on his face.

"How did you eat? Like before I came here? Did you starve or what?" I laughed. The boys got their beers and I began grilling the food. I missed Luke. I felt like a piece of me was missing. I couldn't stop myself from thinking about what I had lost. I knew he wasn't coming back. We were one in the same and I knew after last night Luke was done. Lucy was my twin. She was always the softer one, the kinder one. The gentler one. She wasn't a hunter and she was... naive at times, young a heart and some how wasn't jaded from all we had lived through. I joked she was my baby sister but she really was his baby sister. And despite feeling like his equal as a hunter, so was I. I had tried and tried to help him but he couldn't accept it. I didn't know what was left to do. I was lost in thought. Going through the motions. It had almost been two days and it felt like a lifetime. The three of us had never really been apart. Ever. After Lucy died... was killed. Luke and me we never talked about it, but we clung to each other. Avoided the pain but it brought us closer together and we became better hunter because of it. Think what ever the hell you want... we're codependent or whatever but honestly it could be worse. We are all we have.

"Hey we said medium rare Em." Sam was standing beside me.

"Sorry." I said shaking my head and pulling the patties off the grill.

"Looked like we lost you there for a minute."

"I'm fine. Just tired." Sam gave me a pity filled smile, seeing right through me lies.

"Someone order a beer?" Dean asked walking up behind us. I grabbed it from him right when the top came off bringing it to my lips as soon as possible.

"Thanks." I said as I gulped it down. Bobby grabbed plates and the boys grabbed the works as we prepped our burgers.

"Hey who's ringing?" Sam asked. I heard nothing, but as I focused more on the sounds around me, I could hear a faint ringing. We all looked around questioning who it could be.

"Em, your car." Bobby called. Ran quickly hoping to catch it before the call went to voicemail. I opened my door and yanked the box of old phones from the trunk.

"Hello?" I asked as I answered the call from a number I thought I recognized.

"Emma." His voice meekly whispered through my phone.

"Luke. What do you want."

"Emma I need your help."

"Thats rich. You really expect me to say sure bro whats up? Luke don't call me again."

"Emilia wait. I messed up." He pleaded, I could hear his voice waiver. Something was wrong.... Something big. I turned away from the grill and began to walk away from the boys. They took notice and came after me. Trying to get me to stop, to wait. But I barely even noticed them. I could feel in the pit of my stomach that something was wrong here.

"Where are you?"

"Mississippi."

"Why the hell are you in Mississippi Luke?"

"Em I messed up big time. I went looking for that hunt, but it was a bust. I couldn't take it and I got myself messed up. Em I miss her so much, I'm going crazy without her. Everywhere I look I see her. I can feel her. I just... I want her back. I wanted her back...." He trailed off.

"Yeah so much that you'd risk all of us." I said flatly. I knew it was harsh but he had to know what he was doing was going to get one of us killed.

"Emma I didn't mean to... hell I don't even remember much of it. I just knew we needed her back and I was close to Greenwood... " I felt like he had punched me again clean in the gut. I thought I was going to throw up and pass out all at once. I knew what was there. Crossroads. He made a deal to bring Lucy back. Shit.

"Luke. Please... Please tell me you didn't." My voice was low and dripping with fear.

"Emma I'm sorry." He sounded so pathetic.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" I screamed, anger flowing through me.

"I wasn't thats the point! After what I did to you and loosing Lucy I felt like I had no other choice."

"You always do! You always do! I can't believe you'd be this stupid Luke!"

"But Em she's here."

"And in ten years you won't be. What do I do with that? What does Lucy do with that?!"

"Emma I'm sorry!" He was trying to keep it together but he couldn't anymore.

"You're sorry!? Luke this isn't something you can kiss and make up for! This is more than you dying! Think about it Luke! She came back just to have you go to the pit for her. She's probably a mess!"

"She... she doesn't know. I couldn't tell her."

"What the fuck does she think Luke?!"

"I told her it complicated. She's tired... I said I'd explain it all later." He trailed off the guilt of it all coming down on him. Good.

"Get your ass here. Bring Lucy and we are going to find a way out of this deal."

"Emma she'll die."

"No she won't. And neither will you. Because yet again I'm going to have to handle this family's mistakes! Get here. Now. I'll find a way to fix the mess you've made."

I hung up the phone as fast as I could and I shut my eyes tightly, trying to block out the world, to stop my head fro racing. How could he be so stupid!? He knew better than to make a deal with a demon. He was a hunter. He knew what that meant. And after what we saw happen to Dean, how could he do this? I could feel my legs begin to buckle under me. Suddenly Dean was behind me, hands on my hips. I turned to him leaning one side to him as he wrapped his arms around me as he spoke to me.

"Emma what is going on."

"Luke."

"Luke what?"

"The hunt was a bust, he got drunk and he..."

"Emma what?"

"He went to Lloyds." I could feel his body tense up, the painful memories return to him.

"He didn't." He said low.

"He did."

"How long?"

"Not long enough. We are breaking this deal Dean I don't care what it takes. I can't do this."

"Okay." He said without hesitation. He knew what this meant and as angry and frustrated with Luke as we all were, none of us were going to let him go. Not without a fight.

"He's on his way here with Lucy."

"Wait did he tell her?" He asked pulling away.

"She tired and confused. She's passed out. Dean I..."

"Shhh I know."

I shut my eyes and took a sharp breath in, pulling myself together I pulled away from Dean and wiped my eyes. Game face. It was time to put all that shit away and fix this.

"I need you to bring them up to speed. Please. I need a drink." I looked over at Bobby and Sam, still unaware of the newest complications we had to deal with. Dean nodded. Turning on my heels before I could look at him. Bobby and Sam had no idea what was coming. Round two of this and they were gonna loose it. Oh god Bobby. Hell hounds weren't necessary. He was going to kill Luke himself.


	6. She Could Never Love A Monster Like You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My ass is sweating it's fine.

I walked into the old house like a zombie. I don't remember much but I know I grabbed a six pack and whiskey and went to go hide in my room. I woke up the next morning just like the last, head pounding and my body sore. I ran down to the kitchen, no one was awake yet. I plugged in the coffee pot and made some pancakes and bacon for everyone. I pulled my mug steaming from the counter and splashed in some whiskey. Hair of the dog and all. Sam was the first up as he came into the kitchen he gave me a gruff hello as he grabbed the coffee from my hand that I had ready for him. It was like a pitstop and he was off to the library for lore.

"Foods almost done."

"Mmmm." He said lost in thought.

"Lore?"

"Something has to be here." I left his comment be. I didn't want to talk about Luke seeing as he was going to be the only topic of conversation for the next ten years or till we broke his deal. I still couldn't think about it, I pushed the thought of him from my mind knowing I would break down if I hadn't. Bobby came down stairs and pulled me in for a big hug. He said nothing as he grabbed his coffee and joined Sam. I continued cooking, sipping my coffee hoping Luke was taking his sweet time because I wanted to hold on to the peace as long as I could. I heard the flopping of feet down the old stairs and the roll of the wooden door.

"Hi." Dean said almost sounding he was out of air.

"Hi." I avoided eye contact. "Here." I said as I handed him his coffee as he placed a hand on my hip and a kiss on my cheek. I blushed a little not expecting it. I could feel him holding back from saying something. I was about to press him on it when he spoke.

"I got a call from Luke." He said timidly.

"What?" Why did Luke call him?

"He wanted to tell me himself but... I said some things to him Em. I was pissed and went off on him a little." Oh god Dean. "He wasn't gonna come but Sam fixed it. He called him and did... what ever he does. He should be here soon... I'm sorry I didn't mean to."

"What did you tell him?" I was nervous. When Dean got mad he had no filter and things don't always come out... accurately.

"I didn't really tell him anything as much as imply something."

"Dean." I said turning around to him with a furrowed brow.

"He may have guessed that we... ya know. Spent the night together."

"Okay... and did you try and explain what really happened?! That we actually slept?"

"He didn't give me the chance really...."

"Goddamnit. Add that on the list." I said with anger in every piece of my voice. I slammed the remainder of my coffee back and poured myself another cup, sneaking whiskey in so the boys wouldn't see as Dean began to ramble.

"Emma I'm sorry. All I said was that he screwed up and said shit he didn't mean... I told him if he was the brother he was supposed to be he would have been there for you. That if he was a real man he would have owned it. But because he was such an asshole... I had to be. That he should have been the one to comfort you not me. I was pissed. What he did... I mean I-"

He stopped himself, stumbling over his own words. How could I blame him? Knowing Luke did this, sold his soul. I'm sure it brought back what he went through, all the pain he suffered in hell.

"Hey don't. I get why you went off. You made the same deal he did. You know what it really costs. Everyone here as a right to be mad at Luke. Honestly if Luke hadn't have done it... I would have done something stupid eventually to get her back. We have all gone too far for someone we loved. Everyone in this house. But right now I want to focus... I need to focus, on fixing this."

"Maybe I should steer clear of you guys for a bit..."

"Nope. Sorry. Thats the easy way out. Look Luke knows he's the one that created the problem. Tell him that it was drunk me upset and tired and just a stupid kiss. Tell him I was hammered and sad and you got me to bed."

"A stupid kiss?" He had almost sounded offended.

"What?"

"It was a stupid kiss? Em I thought..."

"I know. Dean look we had a moment. We told each other some heavy shit. Then you drove me two hours for a sandwich. This... is uncharted territory and low on the totem pole so unless you want to sit down and have a chick flick moment right now... we don't have time for it. I'm not sorry about that night but my mind is on Luke and Lucy. At least for the morning."

"We?" He echoed with a shit eating grin.

"Yeah dumbass... we. As in you and me."

"I like that." He said the smug little shit.

"I'm sure you do Dean. Can you focus now?" I tried to suppress a smile, but he could always force one to the surface.

"But thats what you want me to tell him?"

"Dean unless you want to get shot today make him think it was some booze induced pity party I was having and you were just... there."

"Just there. Nice." He pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes tight.

"Hey you kissed me. You opened this can of worms buddy." I Laughed.

"Yeah but you're the one who did all the... ya know... stuff. How could I not?" He shot me a big grin as I rolled my eyes and returned to cooking.

"Hey Em? When Luke gets here what are you gonna do..." he trailed off. I knew what he was asking. I had no answers for him.

"I don't know. I really don't. I don't want to see him. But I'm not going to let him get taken down there. He's my brother. But between the fight and this deal? How do I look at him? And Lucy? She's been gone. I don't know what I'm gonna do."

"Em... If I can- If I can do anyth-" I cut him off suddenly without warning and before I really knew what I was doing I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in. He was surprised for a moment before pulling me in with his free hand and burying his face in my hair.

"Thank you." I said. He wanted to help. I knew he did. He couldn't, but knowing he wanted to was all I needed. "Just for being here. Dealing with all our family shit."

"Mmmm." He sighed. "Your hair smells like bacon." He laughed.

"Here." I said pulling away and handing him a plate full of bacon. "Go nuts. Clog some more arteries." I laughed returning to the food.

Bobby Finally woke up and we all began researching. Finding any other deals that were made, looking for omens in the area to track the demon, digging into lore seeing if it was even possible. 

"Didn't you and Sam try to kill the thing that held your contract, you thought it would break the deal right?"

"Yeah but it wasn't just a demon. It was Lilith." Sam interjected.

"Okay but he's Dean Winchester." I said glancing at him with a grin on his face, "Not to inflate his already huge ego... but... he's the Michael sword. Of course a big time player was going to hold his contract. But Luke? I don't think he's big enough fish." I said.

"And when have we ever been so lucky. Look Darlin I know its not what you wanna hear but you and Luke have done enough in this world that you've earned yourselves some powerful enemies. If I was to guess that idjit's papers are gonna be held by someone who we need to be worried about." Bobby explained.

I sighed heavy. He was right. We made a name for ourselves especially in hell. Any hunter makes a deal and its news. But a Singer? We were no Winchesters but it was common knowledge that we ran with them and had caused enough problems in Hell to earn us some angry demons and not just low level players.

"Plus breaking his deal and keeping Lucy topside is going to require more than simply a demon blade to the chest."

"Thank you for your words of encouragement guys I'm feelin real positive." I moaned my head falling into my hands.

"Em look we aren't trying to rain on your parade but we need to be realistic." Sam said.

I sat there trying to tell myself they were wrong but I knew deep down that this was a disaster. We sat there trying to grasp the reality of our situation, trying to figure out where to go next, when we heard a two car doors shut. They were here. It was like the oxygen was being sucked out of the room. Bobby and Sam stood up, Dean slowly moved to me, almost standing in front of me. I heard the front door open and the shuffling of feet.

"Hello?" Luke called cautiously.

"You dumbass." Bobby hissed at him as he pinned him to the wall, one hand over his chest the other on his collar. "I outta throttle you boy!"

I watched Dean subtly shake off a shiver and heard him whisper, "Deja vu." Bobby said the same thing to Dean when he found out about his deal. "How could you do this! To yourself to us!? To your sisters!? Emma has done all she could for you! You lay a finger on her again and I will kill you myself!"

"Bobby stop let him go!" Sam called, "This isn't helping." Bobby hung there for a moment teeth clenched with Sam's hands on his back trying to get him off. He finally released him and circled back to his drink, sulking in his anger.

"Hey man." They embraced in a 'bro hug' and Sam gave him a hard pat on the shoulder. Luke's eyes fell on Dean, not realizing I was there as I stood behind Deans broad shoulders, too anxious to see him.

"Dean."

"Luke."

"We need to talk."

"I know."

"I don't think you do. I outta kill you." Sam and Bobby shared uneasy looks. Bobby had no idea why they were so hostile and were oblivious to the situation let alone that Luke was aware. Even if what Dean told him what actually happened, he was gonna be pissed with Dean either way. He had always made him promise that I was off limits. He told Dean he'd be the one to kill him if he ever laid a hand on me.

"Look what I said on that phone call, I had a lot in my head... a lot I wanted to say and I think you took it the wrong way and I'm happy to clarify... later."

"No need Dean. I told you what would happen."

"Fine then. Shoot me." Dean said quickly as if to stop him from saying anymore. "But first lets break this deal and save your ass." Sam saw Luke begin to puff up.

"Luke where is Luce?"

"In my car. She needed a second." He turned to Dean, "Where is Emma." Dean stepped to the side, I was standing behind him feeling small. Almost afraid of my own brother.

"Em..." He took a step towards me and I took one back gingerly holding my hand out.  
"Look, I just- lets just fix this." I avoided his eyes and placed a hand on my stomach. I had that feeling like I did every night when our father came home. I realized now why I was so afraid of Luke. He had looked just like my dad and the night he hit me, that was the night I saw my father in his eyes. I grabbed a book and looped behind Dean to the couch. They had a macho moment stare off for a second and Luke sat in the arm chair.

"Oh my god, Lucy. Wait you said she's in the car!" I stood, Sam followed behind me.

"I'm coming." I flashed him a small smile. I knew Sam had been in love with Lucy. We all knew. And she loved him too. But neither of them had the balls to do anything. It was killing us. When Lucy died a piece of Sam went with her. If anyone needed to see her it was him. I walked out of the front door as Sam waited in the archway. There she was sitting in the car circled up and parked near the house. She looked so tired. So sad almost. It hadn't hit me really yet what his deal meant. I mean he was going to hell, he sold his soul. But he did it so Lucy would come back to us. I felt my skin grow hot, tears began rushing down my cheeks. I felt like I was weak.

"Lucy!" I tried to call out but my voice was shaky.

"Luce!" Her head turned up. Her face lit up and she jumped out of the car. We ran to each other and I locked my arms tightly around her as she did the same.

"Oh my god Lucy. Oh my god I missed you so much."  
"I missed you too."

"Lucy you're back." I grabbed her tighter not believing she was real. I hadn't been this happy since she died.

"I know. I'm gonna kill Luke."

"I thought he didn't tell you."

"I'm not stupid Em. I know the only way I was back was because one of you asshats did something you shouldn't have."

"Well I wasn't far behind him." We were still clutching each other, refusing to let go.

"Emma I love you."

"I love you more Luce. You have no idea how much I missed you. How much we all missed you!" I squeezed her tightly. Remembering I wasn't the only one who needed time, I pulled back from her.

"Look at me being all selfish over here." I laughed through my tears. Lucy gave me a question look. I stepped to the side as Sam came into the light. Her face lit up and tears began streaming from her eyes. She ran to him as he descended the front steps. She jumped into his arms and he lifted her up to him. I could see tears welling in his eyes that I knew I would poke fun at him for later. It made me so happy to see them together. Maybe now they could have a second chance.

"I'm gonna head in and give you two a chance to talk." I said smiling. I went around back to grab the rest of the beers from the cooler went I heard bottle clanking.

"Bobby? Why are you outside?"

"Needed beer why so nosey?" He was clearly drunk.

"Bobby, Dean and Luke are they alone?!" I felt the whites in my eyes expand. Bobby still didn't know Luke was hell bent on beating the tar out of Dean. Honestly a fight between the two of them would be deadly.

"Yeah? What did Dean do to piss him off so much?"

"Shit. Not right now Bobby." I said. As I turned to run inside I could hear profanity being yelled and things being thrown.

"I told you if you ever went near Emma that I'd shoot you Dean! And the moment I leave and you've got her in your bed?!" I walked in they were chest to chest, huffing and puffing.

"First, nothing happened that night. Second we watched a movie and passed out on the couch! Unless you want to count the fact that you hit her Luke! What you said to her! That wasn't right!"

"She told you!?"

"Of course she did! For you to use that against her!?" I had never heard Dean get so loud in my life.

"You need to leave. Tonight. So help me god or I'll leave with her."

"You think you can tell your sister what to do? She's going to go where she wants when she wants."

"I'll make her."

"Yeah right." He scoffed "Then you don't know that girl at all. Honestly... you really don't get how much you hurt her? How hard she tried to help you. She lost Lucy too and now she's gonna loose you. And not just loose you Luke, you're going to the pit. You have no idea what is down there. What were you even thinking! You knew better!"

"You have no right to judge me! For any of it!" Luke yelled. "You made the same deal I did Dean don't pretend you're any better than me! I know you aren't! I know what you did down there. Thats why I told you if you told Emma how you felt, if you went near her... that I'd kill you. And guess what, I'm already going to hell, no use in crying over spilt blood!" Luke threw a punch and Dean just took it. He threw another and Dean barely reacted, taking a few steps back.

"Feel better!? Did that help!?" Luke let out a scream as Dean whipped the blood from his lip. "Has any of this helped?"

"Fight back!" Luke screamed.

"No."

"Fight back!"

"NO." Luke was furious as Deans unwillingness to throw a punch. I wanted to step in and break them up but Luke began talking again through his labored breath. The look he gave Dean was so dark.

"What you can dish it out downstairs but you won't fight back up here? You know what I don't have to make Emma leave, I'll just tell her. I tell the kind of person you are, what you've done." Deans face changed. I could see anger and panic grow inside of him. He was almost shaking.

"Luke no," Dean said taking a step towards him. "She can never know."

"Why? Because if she does know, if she finds out, regardless of how either of you feel, she could never love someone like you. She's too good for you. You don't deserve her and you know it. None of us do. You aren't like her Dean and you know it. She'll never stay."

"Stop." Deans eyes were shut tight. His fists clenched so tightly his knuckles turned white. Luke struck a chord and was going to play it for everything it was worth. I had never seen Dean this angry.

"You are just as bad as the things we hunt Dean. As the demon who holds my deal. You're the monster here. And when she hears she'll never look at you the same. She'll be glad to come with me. You are the darkness that's going to bring her down. Hell, I'm already seeing it. You say you love her. That you'd die for her. You will protect her no matter the cost. But you can't protect her from yourself." Dean was the one screaming this time, running at him he grabbed Luke by his collar and smashed him into the wall twice. He landed a few punches while he screamed at him before I ran in, Bobby, Lucy, and Sam followed hearing the noise a few moments later.

"Hey hey! Thats enough!" Dean was focused, tuned in on Luke. His jaw was clenched and his face was bloody.

"Dean stop, hey thats enough come on." I pulled his arm, bringing him back down. He looked at me with those green eyes, full of pain. He dropped his hands and backed away trying to catch his breath as Luke panted up against the wall, holding his bleeding nose. I put my one hand on his chest and on wrapped around his arm. I pushed him back to the kitchen.

"You bastard." He barked as I glared looking back at.

"Dean lets go. Come on, lets just take a second." His eyes were glazed over. "Dean." I said softly, bringing my hand to his cheek.

"Dean listen to me, lets go." I began to pull him out the back door, guiding him. I slammed the door shut and took a second to pause.

"Emma I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"Dean stop." I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I know you didn't. I saw you. I wouldn't have been able to hold back like you did."

"How much did you hear?" His voice was trembling but he stood strong as he pulled me into him.

"A lot."

"Emma I can explain-"

"You don't have to."

"No but I do, look in hell-"

"Dean I know." He stopped, barely blinking he starred at me.

"You know?"

"For a while." I pulled my hands down and began to pick at my dark nail polish.

"Oh. How did you-"  
"Cas has a big mouth. He's also a lightweight. He thought I knew."

"Damn it." He shook his head. "Wait but if you knew..."

"What.. it would make me think differently of you? Dean you were in hell. None of us can imagine what that was like. Jesus I don't know anyone who wouldn't have done it. You're human Dean."  
"But I'm not... I-"

"Stop. I know you. A drunk? Yes. A pig? Absolutely. Chalk full of daddy issue and liquor? Who isn't in this house. But a monster? No. No way. Dean a monster wouldn't sit there and feel guilty. You've done so much to make up for sins you have no blame in." He let out a small laugh and a crooked pained grin.

"Are you gonna let me finish a sentence?"

"Nope. Are you new here?" We laughed for a moment.

"Emma. What Luke said... about killing me if I ever laid a finger on you or... told you how I felt. I know you heard that."

"I did. I thought I'd leave it for tonight but if you're going to tell me all your secrets get um out now Winchester." I laughed back to picking at my nails and starring at the ground.

"Emma... I..." I felt the heat build in my cheeks. God what was he gonna say.

"Emma I care about you."

"Ha. I figured that much. You defended my honor and all." I laughed trying to make light of the moment. I was never good with touchy feely crap. We were both avoiding the fact that Luke screamed that Dean openly admitted that he loved me for both our sakes.

"Emma I would do anything for you. I meant that. Luke saw how I felt when we first started hunting. He knew about me. He knew the kind of guy I was. He made me that promise, then when he found out about hell... he wants to protect you from me."

"Yeah and it's not his job. Especially now."

"But what if he's right. Look death and destruction, that's my life. My whole life."

"No Dean its a hunters life. Last time I checked I'm a hunter too. I know your instinct is to pull back to protect me but we've been hunting side by side for a year. Me knowing that you care changes none of that."

"Yes it does. There is always gonna be a big bad that wants us dead, hunters don't do this because its a liability."

"Are you kidding? Risks are always there. Welcome to the life. Especially in our lives. If you walk away from me, at least have the decency to be honest. Don't pretend you'd be doing it to protect me. It's a cowards move Dean."

"But I told you I meant that I'd do anything to protect you."

"But thats the thing. You don't have to Dean. You really don't. I've proved that plenty of times. What I need is you to trust me. And yourself. Stop focusing on keeping me out of harms way and look at this as tackling everything together De. Focus on whats in front of us. Not just Luke but all of it."

"But I-."  
"D? Shut the hell up." I whispered pulling him closer. I let my breath hover over his lips for a moment, before I could bring him to me his lips crashed onto mine. We were gonna face this. Luke's deal, Dean's fate, Sam's curse, Lucy's life... we were gonna face all of it. And I'd be damned if it wasn't together.


	7. You're Walking With Me Singer

6 WEEKS LATER

"You ready?" I Dean asked as we loaded our duffels with our our demon hunt essentials.

"Yup." I said shortly, focused on my list.

"Oh well I'm convinced." He said his words dripping with sarcasm.

"Shhh."

"I know what you're doing."

"And whats that?" I said mockingly still not paying him much attention.

"You're burying your self in lists and tasks and hunts to avoid everything." I stopped snapping my head up and shooting him a look.

"Listen Dr. Phil I'm trying to get stuff done. We all agreed this is gonna a be tough and we need to take it one step at a time. Thats what I'm doing."

"You haven't spoken to Luke since he got back. Its been weeks."

"I'm sorry have you and Sam suddenly switched bodies? I don't want to talk to Luke. I have nothing to say. We are breaking his deal and he's leaving. I'm not talking about it anymore."

Dean knew not to argue with me. I had steered clear of Luke from the moment of that fight. We benched him on a lot of stuff because his temperament was out of control. Lucy stayed back too to help Bobby. Finally It was me Sam and Dean hunting together again. I had missed it. I was so angry and uncomfortable at Bobby's now with all the tension, the moment we set out on the road was the moment I felt like I could breathe. Plus Dean and I could actually enjoy time together. Sam didn't mind me taking the front seat so long as he got to use my head phones. He hated our music but I loved it. We'd cruise in the impala till we hit the case then go out for some dinner. Sam would break off and Dean and I could have some time at some yokel bar alone. Amidst all the drama and chaos, not to mention that absolutely solid brick wall we were hitting with breaking Luke's deal, the time Dean and I spent alone was my chance to forget all of it. No pressure on anything. Just a few drinks and my favorite person. Cheesy I know but I finally was happy. Sue me.

"Did I hear my name?" Sam called thumping down the stairs.

"Yes Rapunzel." I laughed pointing to his crazy bed head. "Get your ass moving in ten. We found some omens outside of Texas that is defiantly a crossroads demon."

"Fine." He huffed as he went back up the stairs.

"Hey has Lucy told you anything? Progress maybe?" Dean whispered with a chuckle.

"What do you think. No." Lucy being back was amazing. It was like no time had passed. We practically shared the same bed every night and I spent the whole time catching her up on stuff. When I told her about me and Dean doing... whatever the hell Dean and me were doing, she said Sam owed her $50. Apparently they bet on when we'd figure it out. Funnily enough Dean and I had made a similar bet.

"Speaking of I do believe I won our bet big guy. Pay up." I laughed holding my palm out.

"Hey hey hey. I still have time, three days to be exact. Why don't we make it interesting." He said inching closer to me. He tucked his fingers in my empty belt loops and pulled me to his chest, it took me by surprise how fast he did it and I lost my balance slightly, studying myself by grabbing on to his jacket.

"How so?"

"Bring Luce on this one. It's easy and she's probably getting a little cabin fever." He was right. Lucy never really hunted but since she got back she swung into lore full force and was learning fast. She had the basic skills.

"I don't want her hunting. Research only. No exceptions. It's not gonna help if I'm worried about her the whole time."

"Oh so now you feel my pain." He laughed.

"Hey I can hunt. Lucy was always more of a book nerd."

"Reasons why her and Sam need some time!"

"Wow really trying get your brother a date here aren't ya."

"Listen if you knew how uptight he was you would be pushing for him to get lai-"

"Dean!" I yelled in a high pitched tone. I slapped his chest trying not to laugh. "That is my sister! Come on."

"Lord help me." He pulled my face close and leaned down with a soft slow kiss.

"Ballsy." I heard a familiar sass. I looked over and saw Lucy leaning in the door way smirking at us. "You know Uncle Bobby is up right? Sam and I may be hip to whatever it is you two are doing here but Luke? And don't even get me started on Uncle Bobby. Luke isn't gonna do jack compared to what Uncle Bobby will do to Dean." She laughed.

"Bite me." She stuck out her tongue playfully. God I missed her. "And go pack. You're coming with us." Her face lit up and she rushed to her room. Dean had a cocky look on his face, I knew he thought Lucy coming would wake those two up and get him some fresh cash in his wallet. With that look, he deserved to be knocked down a peg.

"She's not wrong ya know. He'll string you up. By your balls." Dean stepped back and a hand instinctively cupped his crotch, he made a worried face as I laughed and went back to packing.

Moments later Sam appeared back in the kitchen with us.

"All right kids load up." Dean said clapping his hands together and swinging my bags over his shoulder. I flashed him a thank you smile as he marched out the door.

"Emma can I take the front this time?" Sam asked rubbing his knees as if they were sore. I almost said yes but I saw Dean shaking his head with a smile. I knew exactly what he was thinking.

"Nope."

"Oh come on why?" He whined still clearly not awake and cranky as ever.

"Because one I said so and two you bitch and moan about every little thing when you're up here. Read your books and relax." I said as I hopped in looking at the back seat. An evil grin grew across my face and Sam took notice.

"Oh and uh- make room."

"Wha-" He began to say when Lucy came hopping down the stoop.

"Wait is she..."

"Yup. And you two can have plenty of room and time to chat and talk and braid each others hair." Dean chimed in with a matching smile.

"Oh... I'm in the back?" Lucy asked innocently.

"Yeah hop in. We should've hit the road 30 minutes ago." Dean said as he cranked up his music. I gave him and smile and handed him a particular tape. He let out a laugh.

"I think I have a request." I snickered.

"Way ahead of ya sweetheart." He said as he carefully selected 1000 miles came on by H.E.A.T., we were pleased with ourselves as we caught a glimpse of frustration in Sam's eye, his cheeks turning pink. Deans hand slowly found its way to my inner thigh as I gradually scooted to him. His fingers possessively digging in. Squeezing every so often. It was quiet for the a while, just us enjoying the open road. I could see Dean eyeing the two in the back as they began to strike up a quiet and apprehensive conversation. I couldn't take it anymore and decided to turn around and give them a little push. Some girl talk with Lucy, some jokes thrown Sam's way and I pulled out, turning back to the front seat as the tension between them dissipated. God they were both so awkward. As I turned back Dean's eye met mine with a warm smile as he drove down open road.

"Kinda like a vacation." I whispered lightly. His eye crinkled up in the corners. "Even if we end up covered in blood later?"

"Hey I'm gonna take what I can get." He said.

"Thank you. For going on this goose chase with me. I don't know whats gonna happen and I wanna pound Luke into the ground but I need to try."

"I know."

"I... I just..."

"Don't know where to start?" I smiled. He always knows.

"Where to start, what to do, who to kill. All of it."

"We'll find a way." I couldn't respond, just stretched out before Dean pulled my feet to his lap rubbing his thumb on my arch, my eyes closing as I hummed in response, falling asleep moments after.

We drove till about 5 or 6 o'clock when Dean decided we needed to pull into a motel. We had been driving for a long time and nothing was around us. I pulled out my phone and found the closest one.

"Right there. Pub across the street too."

"Finally. How do you guys drive this much? I finally get why you're so cranky all the time Dean." Lucy giggle from the back seat.

"I'm not cranky!" He said sitting up straight.

"We all get testy after a long drive but... you do kinda get short with everyone..." I smiled.

"Oh woman don't you start with me." I kicked his thigh slightly with my leg as he pulled in.

"We're gonna grab some rooms you guys get everything settled." Dean said grabbing my hand and whisking me to the front desk.

"We would like two rooms please. If you have the vacancy." I said putting on my biggest brightest smile.

"Sorry love, no can do. We only have one room available right now. Two queens."

"Oh no. Okay is there another motel in the area? We've been driving for a while and I'm here with my sister and his brother. Kinda need the space." I said pointing back at Dean.

"Sorry dear. Only one I know of for the next few hundred miles."

"Okay one second. Sorry."

"Dean theres only one room. It's got two queens and theres nothing around here for miles."

"Okay. Lets go. I'll have Sam pack up the car."

"No wait. Look Lucy isn't used to this much driving I could eat a whole cow and I swear to god you were falling asleep at the wheel. Lets just get the room and figure it out." I pleaded.

"Now look who's cranky." He joked.

"You wanna see cranky Winchester? If you don't book that room you will, and I can guarantee you're not gonna li-" He shut me up with a firm kiss. I could feel his smiling forming on my lips.

"Listen... I don't take orders well. No one tells me what to do." He said gruffly, trying to hide his smile.

"I do. Go before I shoot you." I pressed a quick kiss on his lips and marched out to the car. I could feel him watching so I walked with a little extra swing in my hips to give him a show.

"Okay. So they have one room with two queens and I am not driving another 6 hours in that car. Lucy you're with me, you and Dean can figure out who gets the bed and who takes the floor."

Luce nodded and hooked her arm on mine as we walked into the room. Lucy threw her bag on the table and skipped into the bathroom.

"Lucy a quick shower. Don't wash your hair. The guys need to shower and I need food. Now." I yelled at her. 

I began unpacking as Sam brought in the bags. I had my usual routine. Sam and Dean liked to throw things all over the place but it drove me nuts especially since I was the only one who packed us up once we finished a case and it was always a nightmare. I stacked Sam's stuff on one side of the bed and threw mine and Lucy's stuff in the top drawer. I took out Dean's fed threads and hung them up. The I grabbed his clothing for tonight. He always like to wear something that was comfortable enough he could sleep in. Well I preferred it. Drunk Dean was like a giant baby. The easier the clothes the easier my night.

I grabbed him a pair of loose fitting canvas pants, a black T-shirt, a dark red and black flannel, and his slip off boots. I pulled my black jeans, my silk tank top and my old leather jacket. I laid out my high heeled boots. I loved them because they were comfortable and looked like combat boots but they gave me some height so I didn't look like Sam and Dean's little sister, a common misconception at bars. I slipped on my clothes before the boys came back, wiggling into my jeans. I pinned a little of my hair back by each of my temples so it was out of my face. I had no makeup on so I did my usual tinted cream, mascara and lip balm routine and laid down on the bed for a second. I drifted off for a few minutes when a thud landed on the mattress behind me. Dean. His arms wrapped around me and pulled me close.

"Surprise! Guess who?"

"Dr. Sexy?" I joked turning to face him. I planted a kiss right on his lips as my fingers grazed over his scruff.

"I like this." I said itching his cheeks.

"Really?"

"Hell yeah." He returned the favor, his lips hitting mine. I giggled.

"Where's Sam?"

"Right here unfortunately." I heard Sam call from the corner of the room. I let out another laugh. I sat up on the bed folding my legs as Dean propped himself up on the headboard.

"Funny how that worked out Sammy. Only one room so we have to share a bed and you and Lucy can... ya know." He said making a clicking noise pointing to the other bed. I let out a laugh that was louder than intended before Sam could break the news.

"Oh no they won't. Me and Luce are here you two can figure out your own arrangements."  
"What?" His head snapped back to me with an almost horrified look on his face that I couldn't help but find funny.

"You didn't think I was going to make my baby sister sleep with Sam-squatch over there? I mean we all know they're both pinning but no way. You two can share or one can take the couch. Hell I don't care if you sleep standing up. Girls territory Winchester." I gave him a glare that let him know I meant it. He began to protest but thought better of it. Which was in his best interest. He sat back with a pout.

"Sorry big guy." I placed a peck on his lips and jumped off the bed.

"Lucy get your ass out of there before I break down the damn door. If you come out of there and your hair is wet so help me god Luce, get ready for a beating because I am not waiting around for you to do it-" Just as I said that the door whipped open and Lucy came out. Hair all done and make up on.

"Chill Em. I'm ready."

"You're the worst. I could eat a cow."

"You said that." He smiled shaking his head. "Please tell me that place has burgers." Dean groaned.

"I'll start shooting if they don't." I said as I grabbed his hand and yanked him off the bed. We all piled out of the room and walked across the street to the pub. I had picked up my pace and let go of Deans hand but he held firmly to mine, pulling me back to him with a smile.

"You're walking with me Singer."

"PDA Winchester?" I asked mocking his tone.

"Excuse me but you never got my permission here." Lucy said running up and linking arms with me. Sam was a few paces back.

"I didn't think I needed it Luce." Dean said.

"Dean I will end you."

"Okay buttercup."

"Oh god I didn't miss that name." Lucy sighed. She always hated when Dean called her that.

"Luce." I whispered.

"What." She did the same.  
"Go walk with Sam. And maybe grow a pair before you get back there to him." I yanked my arm from hers and Dean and I glided ahead. I glanced back watching her cheeks turn every shade of red they could.

"Subtle." Dean smirked.

"I got a bet to win." I smiled as we entered the Pub.

The four of us sat and drank. Dean and Sam eventually breaking off to play pool giving us girls some time to just be sisters again.

"So you and Dean... it's weird that it isn't weird."

"Look theres not really a me and Dean Luce we're just... Jesus I have no idea whats happening. I don't know but I know I'm fine with it."

"Fine? Dean Winchester is just fine to be with?"

"Luce stop."

"Come on I've been dead for how long, resurrected and you have zero carnal tales of the famous and delicious Winchester?"

"Lucy! Jesus why? Look it's not like that... I'm not... you know how I am."

"Oh... my... God. Don't tell me the whole taking is slow thing is actually happening."

"Screw you!"

"No screw him!"

"Screw Sam and you have yourself a deal." And with that she nearly had beer pouring out of her nose, blush creeping up on her face. Not so fun when the tables turn.

"See how awesome it is to talk about?"

"Emma I've been dead. Sam... he had Jess, I was never even a-"

"Lucy he's in love with you." Her eyes shot up. "Lucy he went insane when you... we all did. But Sam... he just... stopped. He stopped being himself. He was a shell. Worse than with Jess. At least thats what Dean said. We all lost our shit and killed everything in sight. Drank, packed rounds then did it again but Sam went dark. We lost him the day we lost you." She looked over at the boys shoving each other between shots, trying to get in the others head. Both of us smiling at the sight of our boys. I reached out for her hand squeezing it, remembering she was really here and back again.

"I'm so glad your back. I don't even have words Luce. With out Bobby and those idiots I would have been 6 feet under with you in no time." Her face fell. "Not like with Mom... I learned my lesson. But my hope, my will it all faded. Having a second chance, even though Luke has royally screwed our family in the process, I'm not wasting a second anymore. Neither should you. Don't drop your pants or anything... start with just dropping that wall you have up. Get to know him again. You two are magnetic." 

She looked at me with a look I missed. I have never been one for the touchy feely crap but the sister moments, I missed these. Thats when it hit me she was dead. When I needed a shoulder but she was gone. Honesty was never a question between us. It was just an unspoken agreement. And when the one made the other stop and listen, we heard. We knew it was for a reason. Slipping off my stool I gave her hand one last squeeze.

"I'm gonna get a beer. You should go play some pool. Hustle him a little maybe you can win some money off him." I laughed planting a kiss on her cheek. "Just get to know him again."

Marching up to the end of the bar I waited my turn almost patiently leaning on the bar fidgeting with my rings. Glancing over when Lucy's laugh rang out. Seeing those two playing pool, being around each other again. We were back. I had her back. Our scales were balanced, the dynamic was at ease. Everything clicked again when a hand reached to the small of my back. I jumped at first, but I knew that hand.

"I missed that sound." He said over my shoulder. My eyes followed his, falling on Sam and Lucy. Pool sticks in hand the tension shrinking by the second. 

"Me too. It's surreal. I never thought I'd have this but it's like nothing ever changed in the first place. My head can't catch up."

"Give it time. You guys will get there." I turned to him, that face. Those eyes made me melt.

"Thank you."

"For?"

"A normal night. I needed this. We needed this."

"This ain't a normal night babe. It's a date. Sit your ass down I'm buying."

"In that case get nachos." I smiled planting a kiss on his cheek. 

The rest of the night was filled with beers, bar food, and Dean and I just being together. Watching Sam and Lucy fall for each other was more than I ever thought I'd get. She was dead last I knew. My best friend and my life line gone. But now she was back, happy. I had Dean by my side even if neither of us had any idea what we were doing. Luke wasn't my problem, at least not for the night. This is what we earned and we made sure to soak it up. Because soon... I was going to rain hell down on hell.


	8. Going To Be The Death Of Me

"You know I've tried to be real professional here big guy but this whole playing dumb act is getting tired. It's not the first time I've seen it and I gotta say you're not selling it. So how's about we cut the bullshit and you tell me what I need to know."

"I'm not telling cause I ain't playin'." It spat through gritted teeth.

"Well thats unfortunate because you already got one knife dirty and my other one was a gift. New and improved from the last demon I gutted andI'd hate to break it in on a low level jackass like you. So either you give me a name or I'm gonna get real cranky."

"I'm gonna peel the skin off your bones inch by inch you little skank."

And I'm gonna pull your tongue out of your head with my bare hands. Start. Talking. Bitch." I growled driving the knife across it's skin. Fresh blood mixing with sweat and old wounds as I carved into it.

"Jesus fuck you bitch! I don't know shit!"

"Yes you do! Tell me!" I screamed over and over jamming the knife into its leg and twisting as it howled, my own voice screaming along with it.

"Emma!" Dean screamed. Grabbing my arm and yanking me back. I pulled and fought but he was stronger than I was. "Hey come on take a second!"

"Dean stop!" I huffed yanking away from him and back towards the table, giving myself some distance from that pig.

"No! Look you need to take a break. Go for a walk okay? I don't think he knows anything and we're spinning our wheels."

"I summoned him from the closest crossroads to Lloyds. Theres no way that scum bag doesn't know who's working the booth next to his."

"I get that but you've been at it for hours and none of them have." He tried not to let his eyes wander to the 7 bodies laid strewn around the abandoned barn we were hiding out in. "Look I get you need answers but slaughtering every demon we come across isn't gonna help and its wasting time."

"That's right put a leash on your bitch Winchester." It hissed. Dean whipped around before I could get a shot off.

"Can it ass hat you ain't leaving here breathing." He turned back to me, coming to rest his hands on my shoulders. "Look lets drop this tonight. What ever tip you got wasn't the one we're looking for. Lets get some food and hit a motel for tonight. Take a second to catch up." He looked at me, eyes begging me to just take time.

"Dean I can't I have to-"

"Dead end sweetheart. I'm calling it." I huffed exhaustion hitting me. I nodded walking back over to the demon we had tied up.

"Last chance to say something useful before I stab you in your skull."

"You won't save him. He's gonna die. He's gonna get dragged to hell. He's gonna burn and he's gonna come back for you with black eyes and no reason not to rip that pretty little heart out. Doesn't matter what you do to me. He's marked." It laughed. I grabbed the knife and lodged it in the demon's skull before stomping off, leaving Dean to follow. This is gonna be the death of me.


	9. Stop At Nothing

DEAN'S POV

Weeks. Weeks of her barely speaking about anything other than omens, demons, and the next state we were running to. I lost count of the bodies she had dropped. She was feral. Not sleeping, barely eating. Like a machine. She was colder. Distant. She was pushing me away. Her only thought was getting to the demon. Finding it or getting a name, a location. She was determined to get anything because after all this time, all this blood. She had nothing, no leads or anything that could save Luke. We barely spoke. She locked herself in her room. She was loosing herself in this all while screaming about how she hated him. How she was glad he was going to rot in the pit but I saw through it. She was furious at Luke for making a deal. The same deal I had. She couldn't loose him but she was too broken and torn up to actually admit it. So she buried herself in everything. We tried to slow her down but she ended up running off on her own. Taking down some demons and getting pretty beat up in the process.

It sounds so selfish but as the time passed she barely looked at me. Hadn't kissed me in weeks. Hadn't joked or laughed or had time for anything other than slicing and dicing meat-suits. My girl was fading and it was killing me. 

"Were are you going?" I said quietly, afraid to poke the bear.

"Hunt." She grumbled as she moved back and forth barely stopping as she packed clothes and weapons in her duffle. 

"Where about?"

"South."

"Were you going to tell us or take off again."

"Take off."

"Oh cause that worked so well last time. Hey... Em stop. I know you want answers, but so do I and this whole me Tarzan you Jane thing is getting old. Form a complete sentence. Tell me where you're going at least." She stopped, her back to me hunched over as she took a deep angry breath.

"I'm going to Texas. Reports of hell hounds. Hell hounds mean souls being collected. Souls being collected means souls were sold. To a crossroads demon. And If I don't stab it in the throat who will?"

"Okay. Wheels up in 20 okay? I just need to grab some clothes and-"

"No. It's better if I hit this one solo. Lower level, sounds simple." She zipped her bags, taking a last look at everything and slinging them over her shoulder.

"Alone? Again? Em you're still hurt. I'm not letting you go out there by yourself injured you're lucky I'm not making Sam come for back up."

"Maybe I wasn't clear. You aren't invited Dean."

"Luckily I don't need an invite." I blocked the door, arms folded chest puffed. Dropping the hammer. She ain't going end of story.

"Cut the alpha male shit Dean. Get the fuck out of my way." She couldn't even look at me.

Son of a bitch. She was stubborn as a mule.

"Cut the kamikaze rampage! You're gonna get yourself killed Em!" 

"Dean last chance. Move."

"Baby please just pause for a minute and... and... I don't know! Just stop!" I was pleading with her sounding damn pathetic but I was moments away from screaming at her.

"I'm not your baby. I'm not your anything. So get... the fuck... out of my way." 

She spoke low and slow. Her words stung but I knew she didn't mean it. She had a one track mind and it was on the bloodlust that was coursing through her. I hid the shiver that ran up my back. I forget this little ballet dancer is fucking scary when she wants to be.

"You know what? No. Bullshit kid. You don't get to go anywhere till you hear me. Don't wanna share? Fine by me. But you're gonna listen. So sit your ass down and fucking close your mouth." She didn't sit but she didn't push. Now or never. 

"I know you're panicking its written all over your face. And you think killing your way through every black eye'd bitch is going to help you but it's either going to get you killed or green light your ass for all of hell. Now I'm not saying your methods are wrong but your execution is sloppy and your piss poor at seeing what this is doing. Em I know you want to save him and Lucy but you've gone zero to a thousand and have no grip." 

She started to argue but I cut her off. 

"Can it I ain't done. I hate talking. I hate meaningful moments because they make me squirm but woman I swear to god if you don't get your head out of your ass and realize we are a team... that we are in this together I'm gonna loose my shit myself. I'm not saying this because I'm trying to control you or slow you down because you can't hack it. I'm saying this because you've avoided it and its damn time you realized you're my woman god fucking damn it! No choice in the matter you're stuck with me so let me in or I'm gonna tie you to that bed!" 

The words had fallen out of my mouth so fast I hadn't realized what I said. I felt my eyes go wide realizing I was about to get my ass beat for treating her like a piece of ass. I didn't even mean to make that last part sound the way I did. I just meant I didn't want her leaving like this but the thought of having her tied up flashed through my head and I knew she was going to kick my ass for that.

Her face was scrunched like she was pissed but it was breaking. She knew what I meant. She knew what I was trying to say... what I couldn't thanks to the A+ Parenting skills of John friggin Winchester. Her bag slumped off her shoulder, eyes still on my boots. A few long moments dragged by.

"Baby I'm worried. I want to help you. You have to let me help you." My hands found her hips. My favorite spot. God I want run my mouth along them. Feel the skin around it. Burry my self just below-

"I don't know what I'm doing." Her voice was barely there.

"I know. Neither do I but we can figure it out. Not alone." Her hands fell to my chest her head followed. She didn't cry, but she fought it. Sucking in a harsh breath.

"I hate him so much. I never want to see him again. What he said, what he did. The deal, Lucy... what he said about you. I can't even look at him but D I can't loose him."

"You won't. You own't loose either of them but Ems, you can't loose you while trying to save them. Ain't gonna work. Sweetheart if I lost you... Em it'd kill me on the spot. You're in the thick of it because its your siblings and I get that I've been there. But I have some clarity you don't. Let me in baby." there was another long pause as her body sunk into mine, wrapping ourselves in each other. She's got me turning into a sap over here. Jesus.

"Your woman huh?"

"Damn right." I growled pulling her hips to mine, rolling them just slightly. God I want to be inside her already. Above her, behind her, under her. I want all these clothes out of my way so I can just-

"Thats that alpha shit. I hate that shit... but I could get used to that... part." She smiled against my chest. "How about we have some dinner and I can show you the case. I think I could compromise... a little."

"Done."


End file.
